Why?

I'm going to freaking die like how i died in LES today.
Sigh. I'm getting lazier. And lazier. Where has my willpower gone to?
Why am i so freaking lazy and so freaking stupid?
I really am not who i used to be.
I am shitty, fugly, stupid, lazy, lame, evil, insensitive, stupid.
Mayb i said stupid twice, but that was intentional.
Argh. I better do something about myself.
Shit.
I have to work harder. Because I may not be able to board the express train otherwise.